I Became an Escort at 18

I started doing porn on my 18th birthday. A month later, due to some traumatic events, I dropped out of school and quit my job at the restaurant where I had been working for a few months. I soon met a man online who offered me money for sex. I was scared but needed the cash since I had just quit my job. I said yes.

He sent a cab to bring me to his big house in the suburbs, which he shared with his roommate. He even had a sports car in the driveway. After the session, I ended up leaving his house with $100 in cash and a free bag of weed. I instantly fell in love with how fast I could make money for just having sex. I had only made $40 a night in tips working for hours at my restaurant job. To make $100 and get free weed in an hour or two felt like a dream come true. I saw him a handful of times after that and started taking on more clients.

Escorting made me feel like I had value. For the first time in my life, I felt powerful. Men not only wanted to be with me but pay me for my time. I soon felt like this job was made for me.

I instantly fell in love with how fast I could make money for just having sex.

As a Prostitute, My Clients Were a Mixed Bag

Prostitution did come with its cons though. I never had a great screening process for my clients, so I never really knew a whole lot about most of them before meeting up. Because of this, each night felt like a gamble. I never knew if I was going to enter a hotel room and get arrested, hurt or just make my money and leave.

I did have a few uncomfortable experiences. There were two times when clients had ripped me off and paid me less than I had asked for. I even had a client ask me “how kinky I was” because he wanted to know how hard he could “beat the shit out of me until it was considered abuse.” But those bad experiences didn’t occur often. For the most part, my clients were just average. They were usually middle-aged men who paid me exactly what I asked and got off. Then I’d leave.

Some regulars went the extra mile, spoiling me with tips, weed and alcohol. My favorite clients were the ones with nice cars or ones who liked to take me out on dates or give me extra money for shopping sprees. I also did porn at this time, as I loved being in front of the camera and working with photographers in my area to create amazing content. My favorite project was signing posters and selling them to my clients. I loved being told that my posters were being hung in men’s bedrooms. It made me feel special.

It's not something I regret.

I Struggled With Drugs and Alcohol to Cope With Work

Although porn and prostitution made me a good amount of money, it all went toward clothes, alcohol and drugs. Looking back, I wish I had saved the money and put it toward something more important—like getting myself a car or moving out of my dad’s house. I was in such a dark space in life that I didn’t really see a future for myself, so my money never had a lot of value in my eyes. I didn’t know what the next week, month or year of my life would look like—I wanted to spend my money while I had it and enjoy myself in the moment.

I struggled a lot with using drugs and drinking as a way of coping with issues I had at the time. My substance use eventually started getting in the way of my work. I was a constant mess in front of my photographers and clients and struggled heavily with depression and anxiety. I had awful paranoia due to how fucked up I was all the time and the anxiety that came with my job. I stopped doing prostitution a few months before my 19th birthday. The last client I ever saw was a middle-aged man who had ripped me off and paid me way less than what I had asked for. I went home and cried for hours that night.

He was my final straw, and I decided it wasn’t worth the risk of possibly getting arrested or hurt. I still continue to do porn to this day, and I'm in a much better place mentally. If prostitution was ever legalized, I would gladly come out of my retirement. It's not something I regret. Most of my friends and family know I did it. It's a part of my story, and it’s made me who I am today.